My Love Stories

Stage 1: Puppy Love (It hurted!!!)

I would consider that as my LOVE AT THE FIRST SIGHT!

the unheard-unsaid-unknown love to a hansome boy since standard 6 until form 4!
i never have a change to talk with him, i'm so shy.

that is my symptom!
if i love someone, i become so shy to him!

he has a very nice voice, he represented the school in singing competitions/ quranic recitation!

he was a prefect, so did i. but he always late to school and i happenned to monitor in front of the gate! which i think that is the most popular spot for prefect to carry their duty. students see their faces everday! with their name tags! they get promotion!

IT HURTED!

When i only love him but he does not know, he never realize my existence, never remember me, never want to know me closer, ever hope me will walk in front of him, never bother what happen to me, and even does not bother to know my name!!!

While me,

so excited going to school hoping to see him everyday, if not i feel so sad and hope for the day will quickly ends, so i could see him again. i miss him.i hate holidays because i know i wouldn't be able to see him. i watched him singing on the stage, reciting quran, i listened to his lovely voice with my heart.i watched him walked through my class. Oh my! Though he never bother about me, i know most about him!

it happened during photographic session for new line-up prefect and he happened to stand next to me!!! i was shocked!trembled!and my heart bursted to excitement!

I still missing him and love remain to him even after he transfer to high school! i missed him! i waited to see him whenever there were competitions held in my school because i believed he would attend as particpant or as visited student or as supporter! and i was right! he was there in front of my eyes but he did not see me, nor to know what my sight meant to him! I MISS YOU!!!That was it mean!

At last, i got to know that he became my sister's classmate and visited our house during eid celebration! BUT I WAS NOT THERE!!! Oh my!

I was not sure if this love is going to end up somewhere or no where.
but what i must say...

It was so hurt-hearted love. unsaid 4 years love to the person who never know my existence. I found out from my sister he was dating with her friend! I was so sad!

but, i kept praying to forget him! because it hurted my heart so much within 4 years. i just cant stand it for another year or years. I just want to forget him!

I DID!

After my form 3, i went to the high school where he studying and it happened on afternoon after school time. I waited for my brother fetching me, sat at the stair talking with friend.
he came suddenly to went-up by the same stair, with his good and smart looking. i was shocked! my first time after graduated from old school! I SEE YOU AGAIN!!!

"you girls dont go home yet?" He asked. and my friend replied on behave of both of us. i still shocked. there was something i said to him after that , i couldn't remember except he smiled back to me!AND I REMEMBER THAT SMILE UNTIL TODAY. SUCH A SWEET SMILE!

THAT WAS IT!

THE FIRST AND THE LAST SHORT CONVERSATION BETWEEN US AFTER I DEVOTED MY HEART FOR 4 YEARS TO HIM.

BUT...I SMILED TO MYSELF, I FELT THE SKY WIDEN. I FELT SO HAPPY THAT DAY, MY HEART WAS SO PLEASED. NO TEARS, NO MORE MISSING, NO MORE HURTED FEELING.

MY PRAYER CAME TRUE! I DOES NOT LOVE HIM ANYMORE!!! I'M GLAD. I'M HAPPY FOR GIVING MY HEART A SPACE TO BREATH AND LETTING GO THE PAIN AND SORROW!!!

That is my puppy love. my hurted love. my unknown love. my one-handed love!NO REGRET!